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Stingers

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UEA sent two teams with a mixture of first, second and third team players to compete at Blyth- Jex School in the annual tournament hosted by Stingers Korfball Club. Harry Low follows UEA I’s progress while Adam Everett charters the fortunes of UEA II.

UEA I: Aisha Anas, Hannah Driver, Amanda Halliday, Debs Turner
Harry Low, Alex Macnab, Jimmy Seymour, Swaraj Thancanamootoo

Placed in a group of four alongside Norwich City II, Jedi Knights and Cambridge City, UEA I knew they would have their work cut out to come out on top.

They could not have asked for a better start, though, finding themselves 1-0 against Norwich City II courtesy of a runner from Harry. The score stayed this way for some time before Jimmy found some space to open his account for the day. UEA continued to dominate even after the change of ends and Swaraj converted a penalty to make sure of the win, the game finisheing 3-0.

Next up was the Jedi Knights, arguably the strongest side in the group, and UEA had no answer to their pace and movement and after a tough 18 minutes of korfball their goal difference had been set back to zero after a 3-0 defeat.

The final group stage was perhaps one of the liveliest matches of the day with six goals shared between the sides. 2-0 down inside of five minutes, Harry pulled one back for UEA before Cambridge, with two former UEA players in their ranks, restored the two goal cushion. Swaraj scored his second of the tournament but it proved to be no more than a consolation as the opposition scored again to close out the match 4-2.

Expecting to be in the league for 9th-12th place, UEA I were pleasantly surprised to learn that they had achieved the accolade of best third place team in the opening group stage, meaning a chance to finish as high as sixth, provided they won all of their remaining matches.

A rematch with Jedi Knights saw a much improved performance with Jimmy putting UEA in front, only to limp off moments later; having already ignored doctor’s orders Mr Seymour turned his ankle in the opening match only to continue playing. This time, an injury to his knee meant that he could no longer continue and that signalled the end of his action for the day and indeed, the season.

After a creditable draw UEA I were understandably confident going into their penultimate match. Despite some clever attacking play, they were unable to make the breakthrough, eventually losing 3-0 to Norwich Ice, a score line which flattered the opposition.

And so to the final match for UEA I and a game against Cambridge Phoenix. After some entertaining korfball, and some questionable refereeing the deadlock was finally broken with one minute to go, with Harry scoring his third of the tournament and what most though would be the winner. However, Cambridge Phoenix responded immediately and swooped down on UEA’s post to equalise within seconds, meaning the game finished 1-1, and that the opposition had drawn all three of their group games.

The result meant that UEA I finished in ninth position, a commendable achievement considering that many of the team had never played together before.

UEA II: Becca Hubbard, Katie Ladd, Alice Ridley, Kay...?
Paul Ashworth, Alex Edwards, Adam Everett, Adam Knights, Mike Lavine

It must’ve been pushing twenty degrees and barely a breeze to be felt, so the gods were clearly looking down upon the outdoor korfball world. After splitting the two teams up at the start of the day, team II, or Team Awesome as they shall now be known, strolled out onto the pitch to play Ice, one of the better clubs in the Norfolk league. Team Awesome was comprised of a handful of first team players, a couple of second teamers, a couple more third teamers and one complete non-korfer, although you wouldn’t have known it from the way she played. It was a good mix, a happy mix and one whose collective smile lit up the day and brought just a little bit of joy into everyone’s hearts. Ahh…how lovely.

Playing on a pitch that felt about three times larger than CNS (the Mecca of Norfolk indoor korf), one would have expected Team Awesome to struggle in the early going, but the actuality was far from that. Defensively very solid and creative in attack, Team Awesome took it to Ice for long periods of the game, but just couldn’t find a breakthrough. It was a shock, therefore, when Ice somehow took the lead with a jammy goal from out of nothing. Heartbreaking. Soul destroying. If we weren’t so hardcore, there would’ve been tears. An inspired substitution saw Adam leave the pitch, replaced by Mike and almost immediately Team Awesome was rewarded with a brilliant goal. Katie Ladd saw a darting run by Paul Ashworth and duly threw the ball fully fifteen yards into his gleefully accepting hands. With a stolid look of steely determination in his cold, calculating eyes, Paul took his chance brilliantly and put the korfballing world to rights (beat that in your report, Harry…). The final horn blew and Team Awesome had collected their first point of the day. Things looked promising.

After a short break, Team Awesome were back on court, this time against Norwich City 1, again one of the better korfball teams in the region. It was a suspiciously tough group. I blame one of the referees, whom I’ll mention later. Anyway, Norwich City really seemed to have their game together and rushed into a 3-0 lead. We didn’t drop our heads and accept defeat though; Team Awesome fights until the very end. With nothing but pride to play for, things started to click a little better and it became strangely easy for the attacking team to run their players. After a couple of near misses, Adam Knights, Norfolk League Player of the Year, UEA Male MVP, World’s Greatest Man, Miss Student UK and every other award currently in existence, took the ball and duly finished one of his chances with aplomb. Sadly the momentum couldn’t continue and Team Awesome suffered its first defeat of the day by 4 goals to 1.

The final match in the opening league (I still don’t fully know how korfball tournaments work) saw the Awesome take on Littleport Lions, who had little lions on their shirts. It was all very daunting. ‘Frustrating’ wouldn’t even begin to describe this one, as the slight breeze and larger pitch seemed to stop anything from going even close to the basket. There was no shortage of shots going up though. It took until around the twelfth minute for something to happen, when Adam Everett, the genius that he is, decided that the best course of action when defending a runner is to go in a completely different direction to the bloke you’re supposed to be marking. End result: goal for Lions. Grrr… Now it meant that Team Awesome had to score twice if they were to get into the coveted second position slot in the league (I think…as I said, I have no idea what happens in tournaments). With about two minutes remaining in the game and with hope slowly draining from our little team’s hearts, Alice Ridley decided that she and she alone would change things. After taking one shot (clearly as a practice attempt), she received the ball and produced a tremendous shot from mid-range that sent the sidelines into raptures. Annoyingly nothing further happened in the match and the dream was over. Team Awesome, despite clearly being the best squad at the tournament, would not be going home with the coveted Stingers trophy. It’d probably end up going to Knights or some team of that inferior quality.

Now to what we all came to the Stingers outdoor korfball tournament for … a football match! What a football match it was too. Jumpers for goalposts, shirts vs. skins; you could taste the nostalgia. We saw drama, sickening tackles (looking at you, Knightsy), white-hot action and some sublime goals in a twenty minute session that redefined mixed football as we know it. Disappointingly, the horn went and we had to get on with some made up sport called korfball.

I think Team Awesome was put into a loser’s playoff thing, but that didn’t mean that we were going to play half-heartedly. God no, we were going to destroy the next unlucky opponent who stood in our way. It just happened to be the hosts of the tournament, Stingers. Not content with scoring just one in a tournament, Paul swooped in with a second for the day and his goal was soon followed by a second, too, for Adam Knights. Things were looking up and the bees on the Stingers shirts looked tame in comparison to the blurry effect of the blue and white UEA ones as they whizzed past their shell-shocked opponents. Hardly stopping for breath, Alex Edwards scored what he’ll no doubt tell you was the best goal of the day, shooting from just beyond mid-range and making the ball spin around the basket at least five times, before finally dropping happily in. His second goal was probably good too, but I can’t remember. Let’s pretend that it was. 4-0 to the good, Team Awesome was cruising to a comfortable victory. Katie wasn’t content with it just being four though, and scored her first of the day. I can’t remember how the goal went and I told her I’d make it sound awesome, so here goes. Collecting the ball from deep, she made a quick one-two pass with Kay, leapfrogged her player, threw the ball long to Paul, did a commando roll, before receiving a return pass and sinking the ball from fully thirty yards. Amazing. Then Becky Hubbard scored. Becky Hubbard is a wonderful person and a joy to play sport with. She is easily the finest korfballer in England, if not the world. She’s incredible. She now owes me a pint. It ended 6-1; a truly awesome performance.

Up next was the same Lions team that we’d previously drawn with earlier in the tournament. This time history would not repeat itself. By this time the weather had become uncomfortably muggy and you’d forgive Team Awesome for feeling a little lethargic. Nonetheless, we battled on and Alice scored her second goal against the Lions, another excellent shot. This was followed by a second of the day from Becky Hubbard, who’d decided to come into superb form when things didn’t really matter much anymore…bless her. A goal from Lions made things fairly edgy towards the end of the match, but Team Awesome held firm and picked up their second victory in a row and would go into the final match of the tournament on a high.

The final match of the tournament would be, quite easily, the most annoying match that I’ve ever played in. Highbury 2 weren’t that great a team, to be honest, and it should’ve been a fairly straightforward win for Team Awesome, but alas, all’s not fair in love and korfball. Paul conceded a remarkably dodgy penalty early on and that pretty much set the tone for things to come. There was a short period of sustained attack before Alex swooped in with his third of the day: a penalty that he sunk with sublime coolness. The turnaround led to more controlled Team Awesome possession before disaster struck when Highbury managed to put another in. I think there was probably some cheating going on. With a little time left, Adam Everett scored a nice running in shot. Oh…wait. No, no he didn’t. The referee disallowed it because he put one foot in front of the other in a running motion. Running in on a RUNNING IN shot isn’t allowed, apparently. There was a last second penalty too, but I don’t know who missed it. Hmm…

That was that, then. Team Awesome had finished as the ‘best of the rest’ (tenth place). It was a warm, tiring, but overall very rewarding day of korfball – and football – in some posh school. Did Team Awesome do better than the other lot of UEAers? You’ll have to read Harry’s report to find out. If he said that they did then he’s clearly lying.